My column from January 28, 2017.
What happened to civility, courtesy and respect?
Perhaps I view the past through rose-colored glasses, but
the rise of the internet as a place to connect with others seems coupled with a
sharp decline in behavior.
People say hateful things online. They call others ugly
names, use slurs and make threats.
In a Facebook post, a man once told me he wished I would die
because he did not agree with or like my point of view.
Who does that?
When did we become so firmly entrenched in our convictions
that we consider our view the only “right” one and anyone who disagrees with it
is not worthy of life?
We could follow the adage that one does not talk about
politics or religion. And perhaps update it with “never read the comments
online.” But given current events, it is difficult to escape politics on social
media. Especially when so many rely only on the internet for information.
Is it the anonymity of online conversations that brings out
people’s ugly side? Hiding behind a user name seems to free people to post
things they probably would not say if standing in front of another person.
Communicating via text, tweet or comment removes tone of
voice, body language and facial expression from the conversational equation. We
need a sarcasm font for those that fail to recognize it in print. Some people
fail to grasp that typing in all caps is the internet equivalent of yelling.
While I try to avoid online arguments, sometimes I cannot
help myself. The way social media arranges my newsfeed keeps defaulting back to
the most popular conversations appearing first. Those conversations usually
involve politics of late.
I see too many fallacies used in online “discussions.” I
hope I do not use any myself. A fallacy is a mistaken belief or failure in
reasoning. Using fallacies undermines the logic of an argument. Logical
fallacies include slippery slope, generalizations, “moving the goalposts,”
circular arguments, straw man, red herrings and more.
The most common fallacy I see online?
Ad hominem- which means attacking the person arguing with
you instead of tackling the argument.
If you wish to learn more about fallacies, visit https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fallacies.
I also recommend a visit to https://globaldigitalcitizen.org.
The Global Digital Citizen Foundation is dedicated to “cultivating responsible,
ethical, global citizens for a digital world.” It offers a great “cheat sheet”
for those wishing to exercise critical thinking skills. I may be biased, the
cheat sheet asks the same questions journalists are trained to use – who, what,
when, where, why and how.
Wouldn’t the online community be a better place to connect
with people and share ideas if we learned how to engage in thoughtful
discussion? Considering issues from other points of views is a good thing. It
might help open hearts and minds.
This week, I decided to police my own behavior online by
coming up with a new social media philosophy. Now, before hitting “share,”
“post” or “tweet” I ask myself, “Would I show/say this to grandma?”
If the answer is “no,” I reconsider it.
Update: Recently, I made the mistake of leaving a comment on Facebook
for a Funny or Die video. "I did not find that funny."
The first to respond said "No one finds you funny."
Rather than get butt hurt and lash out, my response was "I'll get over it."
I opted not to respond to the more hateful comments made.
The first to respond said "No one finds you funny."
Rather than get butt hurt and lash out, my response was "I'll get over it."
I opted not to respond to the more hateful comments made.
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